Our mangy pack met up at Landings Pointe Shopping Center for DD’s latest offering of trail. Many of our usual hands were there including some out of towners: Hasta, Pink, Mike and some Dayton hasher who’s name I can’t remember (sorry!) Bone-a gave a weak blessing (he was way more interested in drinking the beer that anointing DD with it) and the hare was out.

The walkers started out at a leisurely pace (as we always do) and we were quickly overtaken by the runners. They were quickly out of sight but being slow paid off because off in a different distance the walkers spotted DD. We discussed it and decided that it was too hot to run so we cut across the field slowly. All the time we were making comments on the donor cycle that was popping wheelies in the new subdivision and discussing the merits of saving him when he crashed.

A hare snare ensued as DD ran out of flour and stopped to wait for us. Hasta the FRB came out of nowhere and caught up. DD led us to the first beer stop where he replenished his flour and went off to lay the eagle part of the Turkey/eagle split. Before departing he warned that part of the trail was on the RR tracks and that if a train came “just follow the tracks until you see trail leading off to one side.” What a wanker.

After fortifying ourselves with beer, the walkers including Rectal, Brother, Bone-a, Been there, Jungle, Pink, and me set off on the turkey. We went around the power substation, and along some long unused tracks, through a field and some briars to live tracks. None of us were really thrilled to be here because trains barrel through about every 30 minutes and none of us wanted to be the front page story in the Sunday Telegraph “Group of local runners killed by train in WR.” Been there and I were out in front faithfully following globs of flour. Off in the not so distant distance, came a train- FAST. Not really sure how far ahead Been there and I were, I yelled (very loudly, ok, I screamed) “Train” and scrambled off the tracks as did everyone else. That was WAY closer than I ever wanted to be to any fast moving train. We cowered for a while just off the tracks because while it was a fast train it was also a long one.

By this point there is no hash left. So after the train was safely behind us, we continued looking to either side for a path leading away. We got all the way to 96 with no sight of it. Jungle peed in the Subway and reported no flour, so it was back down the track we went. We found what we mistook for hash until Jungle tasted it and declared “Ugh!! Not flour!!” Bone-a and I got screwed. Actually I got two screws and Bone-a got a screw and a nut. It is truly amazing what falls off of trains! We passed the same rotting animals twice- NOT pleasant either time- and finally found trail HANGING in the TREES!!!

Up the embankment we went, cursing DD the entire time. We made our way through the woods to the next water stop where Bone-a decided to water the foliage. The rest of us pressed on to the road where soon we ere passed by Banana in the Bimbo mobile. She was out looking for us because we were so far behind the runners. She directed us to the next beer stop and from there we auto hashed to the end.

Circle was a riotous affair although our beloved RA was unusually sober for the event. There was a lot of drinking and from there it gets really fuzzy because “when one out-of-towner drinks, all out-of-towners drink” and “when one blonde drinks, all blonds drink.” No one was buying that I wasn’t a natural blonde. Thank god Pink took pictures to offer photographic evidence of the debacle. There was another chair incident (there is one at every hash) involving Flipher and Rectal. The pictures are great, check them out! After many, many, many down-downs, we ended to go in peace and (hopefully) get a piece.

~ Dok